To the jerk who passed me in front of the Morton Jr High using a turn lane:
- I was driving so slow (20mph) because it was 3:40pm on a school day and there were still children present, so I was driving the speed limit.
- The school zone speed limit goes into effect on the far side of the high school and lasts until you pass the jr high. That's why I was going so slow for so long.
- You really should adhere to the 3 second rule, and not drive your huge, stupid, gas-guzzling truck so close to the person you're following that she can't see your headlights.
- If you do it again I might have to go all Julia Roberts on you.
Be warned! I almost took down your plates and called the cops.
I'm going to start this with the ending and you can read the middle if you want: on Thursday the 11th our first born will be having open...
1 - JJ Heller and her husband wrote a new song for those of us who are trying to get our acts together. 2 - Speaking of which, thank you...
Some of you may have been wondering and some of you even guessed and now this is the announcement some of you even asked about. We are...