September 2, 2009

I'm having a pity party and you're invited!

It starts right now. BYOB.

Sometimes I just feel sorry for myself, and I let lots of little things that shouldn't bother me, bother me. So today, despite the fact that I got a lot accomplished, didn't have to cook dinner, had Culver's for dessert and watched the good and funny movie Run, Fat Boy, Run, I am currently unable to sleep because I'm feeling anxious.

The reasons for my anxiety really come down to 4 things: I'm not in labor, it's 11:20pm and I can't fall asleep, my brother-in-law is currently staying with Trav's ex-fiance's parents (would that make you feel awkward? It makes me feel awkward.), and I just saw a picture of said ex on FB and she looks really pretty while, damnit, I'm fat, swollen, pimply and the stretch marks on my stomach are about to invade the rest of my body.

Let me tell ya, if you ever want to feel like crap, find a current, good picture of your husband's first love while you look and feel like a beached whale. Instant crap.

Update: I'd like to clarify that I don't think my b-i-l shouldn't be with the ex's parents, it's just a little wierd, especially since I will most likely give birth to Travis' child (you know, a variation of the grandkid they could have had) while he's with them. B-i-l is there for work reasons, as Mr. EP is his boss. And truly, Travis and his entire family have a lot of respect for Mr. and Mrs. EP. So it's not that I have a problem with my incredibly kind brother-in-law, or the ex's parents, it's just that the whole situation is a little wierd for me.


  1. sorry you're discouraged, Bonnie!! I will keep praying for you! HOpe you get some rest soon - i know you'll feel better in the morning. when i am tired i get especially prone to feeling sorry for myself. usually the next day i feel better. Hope you have a great day tomorrow and that that baby comes soon!! AND i'm sure you are still beautiful as ever.

  2. OK yes, she looks pretty, but you're pregnant with his third child.
    You win.

  3. You also need to really break it are creating a home and family with him not her. In all reality you have nothing to worry about.

  4. I was going to say the same thing, that YOU are the one he married and YOU are the one having his children! And YOU are beautiful!!!

  5. I agree with everyone else, but I do know that she has moved on and is happy with another person- just like Travis has with you. :) All things work out for a reason...