Several women have made timelines of their day, documenting all the little things they did for each moment. I thought I'd spin that a little bit and document my thoughts throughout the day. In case you were curious...
6:10 Why is James tapping me while I'm laying asleep and Travis is sitting up next to me, clearly awake?
6:30 I told Travis he could visit his family but only if he was gone for one meal of the day. That booger just left before breakfast. That's two meals he'll be gone for. I wonder if he even changed any diapers.
6:45 He didn't change any diapers.
7:20 Pancakes will feed all the kids.
7:21 Pancakes will FEED ALL THE KIDS!
7:22 I need to make a meme of that.
7:40 Where's the pizza cutter so I can cut the pancakes. I should blog that.
7:41 "I should blog that." I'm so lame. No one gives a damn about my pizza cutter trick. But maybe it'll get pinned because people will find it helpful? I could include the yard stick in the drawer handle trick. It'll be like something Kathryn Whitaker would do. But I'm not Kathryn Whitaker. But maybe she'll be proud of me. Except they're not even my ideas. Whatever. I'm so lame.
8:00 Are they all done eating? They're not gonna leave any syrupy bloated pieces of pancake left on the plate for me to eat? At least they'll be full til lunch time.
8:15 Coffee was made for creamer. Caramel creamer.
8:27 It's amazing how much I want people to not talk to me. It's like that Bjork song about it being oh so quiet. Except Bjork is weird and that song is weird. But I just want it to be oh so quiet.
8:30 Puzzles! We all like puzzles!
8:40 I wish James could talk so I'd know if he knew what I was saying. Sometimes I think he's so smart he's playing dumb. "What? I'm practically a mute! You can't expect me to pick the puzzle pieces off the floor, or eat all my apple slices, or stay in my chair through dinner. Wahahaha! Apraxia!"
9:22 And now the kitchen will be clean for the next 11 minutes.
9:23 Banana bread crumbs? I should sweep the floor. Where's my laptop?
9:34 Someone stinks. Ah crap.
9:39 Everyone is fed and in a clean diaper and happily occupied. Hellooooo, Doctor.
10:15 I miss David Tennet. This guy has no eyebrows. It's weird. But bowties are cool. Allons-y!
10:27 Holy cow, Katie!
10:30 If we get a new house and it has one of those stupid formal living rooms I'll change the space into our "fake homeschool" / playroom. Come on, Pinterest, give me ideas.
10:40 Oooooooo. Like like love!
10:59 I need to feed the kids.
11:06 I really should start lunch.
11:15 Leftovers for mom. This is the best lasagna I've ever made.
11:34 We should all load up and go to DQ.
11:35 Do not add butter, do not add butter, do not add butter so James can eat it.
11:40 Is this noodle small enough for Resa? Death by Farfalle noodle and incompetent mother is a bad way to go.
11:44 Sit and eat and let's all be quiet.
11:45 Or not.
12:00 I need to melt the butter for the cookies.
12:01 What was I going to do?
12:03 James is napping! Quiet time!
12:05 I'm going to make a meme.
12:10 I should check my email.
12:15 I miss Facebook.
12:16 Hellooooo, Doctor.
1:00 I'm gonna really make a meme now.
1:08 Why can't I figure out these stupid meme generators? What's the point of generating a meme if it won't let me somehow upload it to my blog or save it to my desktop. Damn memes.
11:11 This is so ghetto.
11:12 DAMN ALL THE MEMES!
1:21 What is that thumping? The kids are gonna break something... I don't care I just want no one to talk to me.
1:27 I hate the #2 key on this laptop.
1:28 Seriously, I need to melt the butter for the cookies.
1:30 Bake and watch Doctor Who? Don't mind if I do!
1:35 Stupid frozen butter...
1:45 Bennet and Lydia are naked and sliding off the toy box. Don't laugh. Don't laugh. Don't laugh. Travis would be so pissed. Don't laugh. Just look mean and upset.
1:50 Shake, shake, shake the nasty formula up.
2:00 loooooooove this baby girl! Teresa Marie, you're the best baby ever. Gorgeous fingers. Gorgeous eyes. You smile while you sleepily take a bottle. looooooooove.
2:03 And I can just lay you in the crib and you giggle, kick your feet, and go to sleep. Best. Baby. Ever!!!
2:05 Pants-less James Fulton, up from his nap.
2:06 Yes, Lydia, of course you came up here because you knew I had baby bottles to carry downstairs and you wanted to help. Of course.
2:10 Back to baking and Doctor Who.
2:31 Is Blogger taking away the blogs in my Dashboard? I wonder if Cari knows. It needs to be simple so I can do it.
2:54 Children! Please don't cry. Just let me pee in peace.
3:00 Travis will be home in half an hour. As soon as he gets here I'm going upstairs and locking the door. If the cookies are done baking.
3:18 He's early.
3:27 I'm not going upstairs.
The rest of the days thoughts were mostly uncharitable so we'll call it quits there.