How we sold our home and bought a new one without burying St. Joseph

Last fall we put our house on the market. It didn't sell.

A tornado went through the town we were wanting to move to, changing the market there but it didn't matter because our house didn't sell.

We found a house that we loved and we made an offer, which was accepted, but our house still didn't sell.

We lowered the price on our home, and it still didn't sell.

So we lowered the price again. Shortly before Christmas, with our contingency offer expired, we took our house off the market so we could enjoy the holidays without the stress of showings.

There were a lot of people, Catholic and non-Catholic alike, who asked if we were going to bury a statue of St. Joseph in our yard.

Simple answer: no.

This spring we put our house back on the market.

Finally, we had lots of showing, lots of interest, and then one day we had two couples look at it. They both loved it and wanted it. We asked them both for their best offer by noon the next day. In the end we accepted an offer of a newlywed couple for more than our listed price.

Meanwhile, we learned that the house we had wanted in the fall was now "Sale Pending". We quickly had to find a house that was within our budget, not a dump, in a good neighborhood, and big enough to hold a family of seven. We were really nervous.

As we looked online we saw a home that fit most of our requirements: in a good neighborhood, three bedrooms, lots of space, a nice yard, well cared for though outdated so Travis could put some sweat equity into it. Amazingly, the home was safe from any major damage in the November tornado though most of the homes around it were ruined. It seemed perfect for us, except that it was listed out of our price range.

Long story short, we bought it "as is" for a lot less than what it was listed as. This perfect little house is ours, and we will move there in less than two weeks.

Now, I don't want to mislead you: there were times when I was frustrated that our house wasn't selling and we seemed to miss opportunities. But when I look back on it all I can so clearly see the Hand of God, holding some things back and moving other things around so everything would be better than we could have ever hoped for. Even during it all, even with my worries, I still had a strong feeling that it would all work out. That peace and confident trust were really important to me and so I want to share with you

There's three things we did in our hope to sell our home.

1 - We trusted in God's goodness, not superstitions. Burying a statue of St. Joseph because it's supposed to make your house sell is nothing but a superstitious act. As Christians we don't believe in superstitions - we believe in God. Of course there are people who have done this tradition in a faithful and not-at-all superstitious way. Personally I still don't like it, but that is a personal preference and we can disagree. If you have done this as a part of a prayerful practice then I'm not talking about you.

I know that Catholic stores sell Home Selling St. Joseph kits. I know that there are even nuns who make and sell these kits. But it is also quite common, especially in certain parts of the country, for realtors to pass out chintzy St. Joseph statues to every client with directions to "Bury him and you're house will sell!" It is one thing to place St. Joseph on a piece of land or a home you wish to buy, to use St. Joseph to claim the land, and to put it under his patronage. It is another thing all together to bury his likeness in the ground because doing so is supposed to give you the results you want.

2 - We placed the intention in Mary's capable hands. When our home went on the market for the first time I was preparing to do a consecration to Mary using the book 33 Days to Morning Glory. During that time I entrusted Mary with my hopes that our home would sell to a nice family who loves God, and that we would find the perfect home for us to raise our kids in - a place we could all be happy for a long time. I asked her to pray for me, to talk to her Son about my intentions When I would become frustrated I would tell her, "I have no more wine!" which was my code word for: Fix this, please! When I would start to doubt (in her prayers, in God's faithfulness, whether we would ever move) I would ask her to untie the knots in my life. With her on my side I never doubted for long.

3 - We placed an image of St. Joseph in a place of honor in our home. To most people it would have looked like just another Catholic decoration, but every time I passed that image of St. Joseph I would ask him to find someone to buy our house. I spent a lot of time thinking about how St. Joseph had to find so many homes and shelters for Mary and Jesus, from the stable in Bethlehem to Egypt to Nazareth. I know he's good at finding homes and so I asked him to also help us find a perfect home for our family.

In the end, God is our loving Father and He wants what's best for us. It is good to remember that and to trust in His timing and His perfect ways.

7QT - Not my circus, not my monkeys

1 - I'm a Matt Maher fan. His Mass of St. Timothy was the Mass sung at our wedding, including the Litany of Saints which we filled with all our favorite saints.


2 - I'd like to get this Polish proverb made into some kind of sign to hang in my house. Maybe in the living room.

3 - This is what we look like when we go for a walk around the neighborhood.

Except it won't be our neighborhood for much longer.

That's right! We SOLD our house!!!! Thank you to everyone who prayed for us. If you could all now say a prayer that we quickly find a wonderful new home I would be ever so grateful. 

4 - Earlier this week I was able to do a Skype interview with our lovely Seven Quick Takes hostess, Jennifer Fulwiler. If you haven't gotten a chance to watch it I encourage you to do so. Jen is a delight and I had a lot of fun chatting with her about her new ebook, The Family First Creative. You can see it here. 

I'll be sharing some outtakes from the interview on the A Knotted Life Facebook page so be sure to Like it if you have't yet. 

5 - I got a good chuckle out of this. I thought other John Wayne fans would appreciate it too.

6 - Ben, who will be 5 this September is already counting down to his next birthday party. There must be balloons, and plenty of them. His Grandma is supposed to take him somewhere special for lunch and then, I was told, then he would like a surprise birthday party waiting for him. Such high demands, but he's so adorable I think I'll give him what he wants. 

7 - This week was supposed to be Book Week! on my blog but selling a house, celebrating Travis' birthday, and life all got in the way. Come back every day *next* week and I'll have a give away and some reviews of some books that I really loved. 

Have a great weekend, everyone. God bless you all.
And thanks again, Jen!

7 Quick Takes

Thanks to our wonderful hostess Jen at Conversion Diary!


1 - You are loved.


2 - In case any of you guys missed Hafsa's conversion story to Catholicism from Islam I'm including the link right here. I am honored that she guest posted and shared her interesting story with us. There were a lot of profound comments she made but this was my favorite:

3 - Because we try to do meatless Fridays year long, I like to go meatless on Wednesdays during Advent and Lent. This year I'm excited to be incorporating the recipes from Catholic Relief Services' Rice Bowl into our meal plan. The recipes are from countries that benefit from the CRS aid and they are a great way to reiterate to myself and my kids that the money we are giving is going to help real families.


4 - And back to the shallow, though nerdy:
Isn't this scarf fantastic?! A map! Of Middle Earth! I love it!

It's by an Etsy shop called Nerd Alert Creations.


5 - Recently one of my very best friends was home visiting. She's a Sister of Life and so we don't get to see her as much as we'd like. My family was invited to dinner at her house (they're Lebanese - oh the grape leaves! the kibbeh! the cauliflower stew with the name I couldn't pronounce! oh the carrot cake! What? They're American too.) Anyways... Travis and I told the kids we were going to their home for supper and Ben said, "Can I take my shoes off there?" It's the little things that matter in life.


6 - Our house is for sale again. Anyone wanna buy a house that a miracle baby was born in?
To make it look even better than before we did a few little spruce ups around the house. We also tried to make it scream LENT a little less.

I bought a new lamp and clock for the dining room.

I like it.

I also thought it was finally time to repaint this hand-me-down end table. I wanted something bright and bold since most of the living room is shades of tan and brown. On an impulse I picked purple.

I'm not sure if I like it. L asked if I would repaint it after Lent, which made me laugh. I think I might though. I think I'm going to try teal next. But so much for making the house not too Lent-y.


7 - Resa mustache you a question:

Did you hear about the really cool thing happening at our house and in Rome right now?
If you didn't here's a whole list of interviews, news coverage, and blog posts that can update you.
Thank you to everyone for joining us in celebrating! Please continue to pray for the cause and let us all keep our focus on God. He healed my son and the only reason the Church lifts up saints for us is so we can know, love, and serve God better.

7QT: The "I got lotsa questions" Edition

1 - Now Sara Groves has been one of my favorite musicians for many years. I've seen her live several times and she's so great. Like you just sit there in the audience feeling like she's invited you over for dinner and any minutes she's gonna bring out the pie and ask if you want it with a scoop of ice cream.

This song is one of my favorites of hers. The bridge of the song is the absolute best. On the album it builds in such a way that when I'm singing along my voice usually breaks from fighting back tears by the time I get to "the man of sorrow" part.

As an aside, the man playing his, um, thighs is her husband.


2 - In an effort to lose some belly weight so people will stop asking me when I am due I decided to give up gluten and greatly reduce sugar from my diet for the month of December. I'm 10lbs down from the post Thanksgiving top already so it's working and I'd like to stick with it for awhile. Unfortunately I have also noticed that after not eating it for a several days and then having a treat (like on St. Nick's feast day) I got a tummy ache, which makes me think I may actually have an intolerance to it and may need to make it a lifestyle change.

This is very bad, sad news in my book mostly because I love to bake. Now I priced gluten free all purpose flour at my local grocery store and for twice the price I could get half the flour I'm used to buying. We're on a pretty tight budget and I can't just start making all our cookies, breads, pancakes, biscuits, and so on out of this pricey stuff. So what do you, people who love to bake but don't eat gluten, do?

Also, we're starting to think that we may need to take gluten out of JF's diet. So any ideas on what to feed a 3 year old boy who is allergic to dairy, nuts, eggs, and possibly gluten?



3 - How do you pick a color for your living room? I think I've been so afraid of committing to anything that I have created a room of browns with some muted gold and navy for accent. But what I really want is color that will pop. I'm thinking of repainting our living room a soft white color and then maybe painting our bookcases, or possibly the insides of the bookcases some bright color that will really pop. But I just don't know.

I like this green for the bookshelves. What do you think? I'm so indecisive. And we don't even have money to buy a bunch of new paint.


4 - FYI - our house hasn't sold, the contingency offer we had on the house we wanted to buy expired, and we've taken our house off the market for the time being. With the tornado going through Washington I'm not sure what will happen with property taxes and the housing market so we may be here for a little while longer.


5 - I need help with make-up. We don't have a lot of money but I'd still like to invest in some nice foundation. I hate feeling like I've got stuff gobbed on my face but at the same time I know I need something to even out my skin and cover up some spots and the occasional blemish. (I was gonna say zit but that sounded too "Saved by the Bell" for some reason.) Also, my skin is on the dry side of normal, if that means anything. Got any recommendations?


6 - Honestly I could probably use some help with skin care in general. I wash my face with bar soap and the only moisturizer I use is hand lotion, if I even do that. All of a sudden my skin is starting to look really old so I'd like to *fight the wrinkles* and all that jazz. An eye cream and a good, but not too greasy/heavy moisturizer for my face and neck would be great.


7 - Finally, what blogs do you read? I'm trying to branch out a little bit from my little bubble of mostly Catholic women blogs and I'd love your suggestions. Thanks!


And as always, many thanks to Jen for hosting!

Seven Quick Takes: Cake, Millenials, Squash, and Faree Pris

1 - My favorite Cake song ever!

2 - I had the super cool opportunity to interview Simcha Fisher about her book The Sinner's Guide to Natural Family Planning for Ignitum Today. You can read it here if you're interested.

3 - I saw a quiz on Facebook yesterday - How Millennial Are You? It turns out that a lot of my friends, even those who are Millennials are more like Gen Xers. I, on the other hand, scored a 12 putting me right over the Silent generation's line into Baby Boomer. If you take the quiz tell me what you get - it's fun. And it's super short!

4 - The quiz reminded me of a time I was at a Theology on Tap a few years ago. The speaker asked for a show of hands of everyone born in 1982 or after. All the Millenials around me raised their hands. Then he asked for a show of hands for everyone born in 1981 or before. I was the only one who raised my hand. I was like 27 years old and suddenly I felt really old.

5 - A local pumpkin farmer donated a huge amount of pumpkins and gourds for our parish's All Saints' party. He also gave me a few for cooking including this grandaddy of a squash.

Here it is with my coffee cup to give you some perspective.

I was surprised at how easy it was to cut up, I was pretty sure I'd be breaking a knife judging by its size. But it was super easy to cut and clean and bake. I pureed it and now I have all kinds of squash ready to be made into soup and baked into pie and....

and I don't know... is there anything else I can do with it? 

Because I got a lot of it.

6 - I dropped the ball on Halloween because I didn't get a picture of the kids in their costumes. What I'm really disappointed by is that I didn't get a picture of them in their soaking wet costumes. Literally, we were dripping wet. 

But L's got my back because she wrote a book at school about Halloween night.

She can spell her name - I don't know why it's messed up here.
It says, "I was a fairy princess."

Action shot of the trick or treating. She left out the pouring rain and the cold wind but it was there in real life.

7 - And on a final note, I would just like to say that I hate selling a house. 

Thanks, Jen, for hosting!

Five Favorites

- 1 - 

My favorite one week old:

I went in to have a baby last Tuesday, he was born on Wednesday, and then jaundice kept us at the hospital until Sunday. But now we're home and happy.

- 2 -

My favorite blogger meet-up:

I was trying to explain to Travis' uncle why we were leaving the 4th of July family camp out early so a family of people I've never met before could hang out at our house for a couple of hours. 

"She's from New Jersey?"

"You've never met her?"

"You only know her from online?"

"What will you do if she's weird? Fake labor?"

I told him, and the rest of the family who was all listening in by this time, that Kelly wanting to meet me was like having one of the popular girls in high school invite me to sit at her lunch table. Trav's uncle blinked and probably felt bad for Travis and this Kelly woman I was about to host. Travis' cousin said, "We can understand why this would be important for you."

Let me tell ya: Kelly was a delight. She was funny and kind and interesting. Her husband was kind and is obviously a good man. Her kids were well behaved, smart, and didn't complain that I had accidentally watered down the lemonade. They didn't complain that we have no toys for older kids - they just made the best and were sweet and kind.

So the running theme in Kelly and her family is that they're kind. And to further prove it, they brought me a gift basket full of beer. Good house guests indeed! 

- 3 -

My favorite stairs:  

After a good four years of being carpet-less and unfinished and, ya know, ugly, we finally have thick, lush carpet to comfort our feet on the way to our bedrooms.

- 4 -

My favorite Hulu discovery:

Stephen Fry in America

It turns out that Fry's father was offered a job at Princeton when Mrs. Fry was pregnant with Stephen. Mr. Fry turned the offer down but Stephen has always been wondered what his life would have been like as Steve, a man who grew up in the USA instead of GB. 

I think Stephen Fry is charming (in the best way), funny, kind, and warm. In the BBC mini-series he travels through all 50 states and samples little bits of American life: coal mining, Ford vs. Chevy, trolleys, plantations, Vegas, the humidity of the south and the freakin' cold of the north. There were several parts that Travis and I especially liked but I think my favorite was his reaction to Truck Nutz.

- 5 -

My favorite thing about the internet:

When it works, which it stopped doing at some point yesterday but has begun doing again today. 

7 Quick Takes

1 - Gosh I really love this song. And I'm totally impressed that Walk Off the Earth is capable of more than just playing one guitar and covering Gotye. Stupid me for thinking they were a one hit wonder.


2 - I found another treat that JF can eat. It also happens to be one of my favorite things:

 Rice Krispie treats. Holy cow those things are amazing!

Anyways, we've long known that marshmallows are safe for JF, as are Rice Krispies. Then, at the suggestion of my online (and in-real-life) friends I made them with coconut oil. I'll even tell you a secret, the coconut oil above tasted coconut-y and it made the RKTs even better. Oh my gosh.

Anyways, YAY for one more treat that is nut, dairy, and egg free! And thanks to all the friends who suggested coconut oil!


3 - This:

is a lesson I learned from the executive director of the Behold Conference. Not that she ever sat down and told me, "Bonnie, this is what a mature, adult, sincere apology looks like: I'm sorry; it's my fault; what can I do to make it right?" but she did model it for me over and over again. When she apologized to me, when she helped me "script" conversations I'd need to have with others, when she apologized to others she always said some variation of those three things. Even when her fault was tiny compared to the fault of the other. Even when the other never apologized back.

Learning that lesson is one of the many ways that Behold helped me grow in virtue and become a better woman. Sometimes I really miss working on Behold. I can't wait for March 2014 so I can attend the conference and be a part of it again.


4 - As many of you know I lost my first child when I was about five weeks pregnant. If you've ever lost a baby I know you know how painful it was and is, even though after all these years I have some peace.

Because of my miscarriage I am so very grateful for my friend RyAnne's efforts to help grieving parents. RyAnne's first child, Caleb, was stillborn and in her grief she found a way to honor her son and bring peace to the minds, souls, and hearts of parents who were walking in the same shoes she was walking in.

If you have lost a child during pregnancy or infancy I encourage you to attend the A Mother's Love retreat on Saturday, July 27th at St. Philomena's in Peoria, IL. Meals are provided, it is open to couples and is free of charge. Please register with RyAnne by emailing [email protected]. Also, please note that while it is done from a Catholic perspective it is open to parents of all faith backgrounds. You can also find more information at RyAnne's blog, Good Grief!


5 -So Travis and I bought a dump and have been fixing it up slowly. So we kinda pulled a Dwija but we actually knew what we were getting ourselves into. Mostly - we mostly knew.

I don't have a good picture of what the backyard used to look like but you can kinda get a sense from these two pictures.

Grass doesn't grow, but weeds do!

Our house was first a house and then each level was an apartment that seemingly half of my town lived in at one point or another. Eventually we got rid of the upstairs apartment's entryway and toilet.

And then we dreamed of the day we could put in a patio and flower beds. It took years but it finally happened.

Travis worked his butt off getting everything level, building the forms, and whatnot.

His brother, dad, and uncle came down to help and after a few hours of hard work it was done.

The next day Travis cleaned up the flower beds, laid down some mulch, and we are finally to a place where we can enjoy our backyard.

The kids and I even had some pool time the other day.

See that tree? That tree shades the whole patio all day long. It's perfect.

And the stairs that lead to the back porch used to end at the back of the house. Now the porch ends there, making things so much safer and nicer and better. 

And we still have a bit of work to do, some more mulch to lay, patio furniture to arrange, and bushes and hostas and flowers to buy and plant. But in the meantime it's still so great.

And look - no more toilets! 

Good job, Trav. Well done, babe.

6 - We had a good couple of hours outside the other day. Until suddenly I was just done (that happens a lot when I'm pregnant) and I made the kids go inside for naps and quiet time. But I was still "World's Best Mom" that day because I actually even put my suit on too. It's the little things.

7 - And here's a joke.

Thanks, Jen for hosting!

Seven Quick Takes

 1 - Is it just me or have the past couple of weeks featured a lot of posts with rap music? Well, there is no rap music here, at least not this week. Instead I offer you Vampire Weekend. They're kinda odd, but I like them. Hope you do too.


2 -Dressing when I'm super pregnant. It's not fun. It's so hard to keep the "under-womb" covered. I don't think that's an actual word but you know what I mean, right? The bottom of my pregnant belly. Shirts creep up and pants creep down.

Also, as my hips widen in preparation for birth  (look out, July 8th! or 9th... around there) it has become incredibly difficult basically impossible to keep my knees together and sit like a lady. So last Friday I bought a maxi skirt and I have worn it every day since. I will continue to wear it every day until I give birth, and probably then for weeks following. It'll get washed like twice in all that time, I betcha $5.

Here's the skirt:

 I thought I looked better but I guess we can't all be Grace Patton. 

Quick note about the shirt I'm wearing. It's the only maternity top to have survived all five pregnancies and then today, at almost 37 weeks I snagged it on a table at a coffee shop. Ruined. But judging from the picture above that's not really a bad thing. 

Am I the only pregnant woman who does this to all her shirts? Seriously, it may be more annoying than the waddle and stupid comments.


3 - Earlier this month was the anniversary of L's baptism. Her godmother arranged a special day for just the two of them including donuts, a walk to the park, crafting, and lunch. L loved every minute of it.  You can read Katie's recap of it here and you can read about the awesome pearls L gets each year here. And here's few pictures of the fun:

L and her godmother, Katie.

The bag they made. Katie wrote the phrase and L traced it. And the owl is made from L's handprint.

A treasure box L made from Modge Podge and tissue paper. She also wanted to glue a holy card of the Sacred Heart inside. Sweet.

4 - How do people decorate for summer? I have one little Uncle Sam guy I put on the buffet and some patriotic banners on the front porch but otherwise I'm clueless. My mother-in-law was just in Florida and sent the kids a bunch of seashells she found on the beach. I put them in some mason jars and set them out because seashells are beachy and therefore summery, right? But I just don't think I have an eye for this decorating stuff. Seriously, what do you do?

5 - We hung balloons for Resa's first birthday party, which was almost a month ago. Some of them are still up and I think that if they can make it just a couple more weeks they can officially be "Welcome home, baby!" balloons. Perfect!

Truly, I am not getting on a chair to take them down. Even though I got on a chair to take a picture of my skirt. Whatever. Shut up.


6- I'm part of an awesome moms' group at my parish. It is a huge blessing in my life and I look forward to Tuesday mornings and guard them with my life. We pray and eat and discuss together while our kids play. The women in the group have also become great friends and have been very generous in supporting me in my vocation. For example, I have a very large project I've been working on, along with parenting and growing a baby. Travis has also been very busy picking up my slack and working on various projects around the house. To help out, just this past week  one of the women in the group took the boys for an afternoon to make for a lighter load at home. Another woman arranged for her teenaged daughter to babysit for free so Travis and I could attend Theology on Tap Wednesday night. And another woman spend the better part of an afternoon and evening playing with the kids, reading them books, painting with them and sweeping my floors, folding my kids' clean clothes, and washing my dishes.


7 - What's Travis working on? Oh, you know, just transforming this:

 To this:

Yesterday Travis and his dad poured the sidewalk that leads from the back door to the garage. Tomorrow he, his dad, and his brother will pour the patio. In what was once a horrible, bumpy patch of ground that was too shady to grow enough grass we will soon have a large patio with two flower beds on the side, a lovely maple tree to keep it shaded all day long, and plenty of room for the kids to draw with chalk, ride their bikes, and play outside while I watch them from the kitchen window.

The only thing that will make it better will be when I have given birth and can drink a beer, as I sit in the shade, while my kids play, and Travis grills supper. That, friends, will be a dream come true.


And now I'll say good-bye. Have a great weekend, all! And thanks, Jen, for hosting!